4 Practical Tips for Dealing with Social Anxiety

It can be difficult to overcome social anxiety. Perhaps you genuinely want to go out of your comfort zone and connect with new people. But every time you try to work up the courage, you talk yourself out of it. Or maybe you’ve met some new acquaintances you would like to get to know better, but you feel nervous about reaching out to them again.

No matter what your situation is, it is definitely possible to develop your social skills and reduce your social anxiety. You do not have to continue feeling isolated and nervous in social situations. But it can take time to make these changes.

Here are a few steps you can take to begin healing your social anxiety and become more confident around new people.

1. Start Small

You do not have to approach big crowds on your own right away. In fact, it’s okay if you don’t feel ready to go to crowded bars, attend large parties, or say yes to other events that will involve sizable crowds. Instead, you can begin polishing your social skills and working to lessen your social anxiety in calmer settings.

For instance, you might have an easier time going to a meeting for a book club, where you might connect with other people who have similar interests, and you won’t be expected to participate in every conversation.

Taking a class at a local community center could also be a good idea. You’ll be participating in an activity with other people who do not know each other, and you’ll have a clear subject to talk about if you’re having trouble coming up with conversation topics.

2. Practice Small Talk

Do you ever feel like you don’t know how to introduce yourself to people? Maybe when you want to spark up a conversation with someone, you feel like your mind goes blank. Suddenly, you can’t think of anything to ask them, and you feel embarrassed.

Everyone has experienced a situation like this, but if you have social anxiety, you might find that it happens to you again and again.

The solution? Practice small talk before you head out! It might feel a little silly practicing in the mirror, but this exercise can help you come up with polite questions to ask when you’re starting conversations. When you’ve rehearsed a few questions that you can easily work into a casual conversation, you will feel more prepared.

If you feel stuck, you can think back on the questions you practiced.

3. Deep Breathing

Deep breathing isn’t the cure for social anxiety, but it can definitely help you steady your nerves when you’re feeling overwhelmed in social situations. If your heart is racing, and your palms are getting sweaty, try taking a few slow, deep breaths.

It’s okay if you have to step out for a minute - the key is to get back to a state of equilibrium and feel centered again. When you’re not around others, practicing meditation can also help you let go of your worries and soothe your anxiety.

4. Reframe Your Thoughts

Social anxiety often causes negative thought patterns. You might catch yourself thinking, “Why would anyone want to talk to me?” or “Why did I even bother coming to this event?” But thought patterns like this are not rooted in fact - everyone has something to offer!

Try reframing your thoughts around more positive statements. For instance, you could focus on an affirmation like, “I’m welcomed at this event, and I’m proud of myself for attending.”

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Are you having trouble with social anxiety? Working with a therapist can help. Reach out to us today to discuss your options for scheduling your first session.