Setting Healthy Boundaries: Why It’s Important in Both Romantic and Family Relationships

Do you ever feel like your loved ones demand more from you than you can give? Perhaps your family members seem to expect a lot from you, and keeping up with all of your obligations leaves you feeling exhausted and overwhelmed. Or maybe you have a romantic partner who is setting unreasonable expectations. Instead of feeling loved and cared for when you do something kind for them, nothing ever seems to be enough.

You may want to please the people in your life. But this shouldn’t come at the expense of your own boundaries. You have the right to set healthy boundaries even within your closest relationships.

Here’s why creating and maintaining boundaries is the key to forming healthy bonds with your family members and romantic partners.

It Protects Your Time

Setting boundaries helps you protect your time so that you have room in your life for your own hobbies and interests. Maybe you feel like people are always turning to you for help, and you don’t want to let them down.

But you’ve also begun to feel you never have any time for yourself because you’re so busy doing things for other people. Sticking to your boundaries allows you to make time for self-care.

Helps You Maintain Your Sense of Identity

In an unhealthy relationship with a friend, family member, or partner, it can feel like the other person is slowly chipping away at your own identity and sense of self. You feel like in order to make them happy, you have to dismiss your own needs and wants.

Over time, you can feel like you’re losing yourself, and you don’t know how to extricate yourself from these unhealthy relationships. By setting boundaries, you prioritize your own sense of identity. You don’t have to contort yourself to suit anyone else’s standards.

Helps You Figure Out Intentions

Getting comfortable with vulnerability is important. Sadly, some people will use the details you share in vulnerable moments against you. Waiting until you’ve gotten to know someone better before sharing intimate details about your life does not mean that you’re ashamed of anything that happened to you.

It’s an acknowledgment that some people have bad intentions, and it isn’t emotionally safe to share this information with everyone. Committing to healthy boundaries means not rushing into unhealthy relationships.

It Cultivates Self-Respect

Boundaries are the key to developing a strong sense of self-respect. When you feel confident in your ability to say, “I don’t agree with this,” “I don’t feel comfortable with that,” or, “No, I’m not doing that,” you build your self-esteem.

You realize you don’t need to seek approval from others or agree to things that you don’t actually want to do in order to be happy. As time goes on, you’ll attract more and more people in your life who also set healthy boundaries. Setting boundaries doesn’t mean restricting yourself, it’s actually very freeing.

Helps You Avoid Burnout

Trying to be everything for everyone will run you ragged. Burnout can sneak up on you slowly over time, and it does not just happen as a result of working long hours. If you’re saying “Yes” to everything that your loved ones ask of you, and this only encourages them to ask for more, you’re going to feel you can’t keep your head above water.

Boundaries can prevent burnout. You can put your own needs first and balance caring for yourself with supporting the people in your life.

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Are you having trouble setting boundaries in your relationships? Working with a therapist can help. Reach out to us today to discuss your options for scheduling your first session.

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